3 Poops, No nap, and an Ice Cream Cone

Life as a mom has a unique way of humbling us and making us feel insane, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. I decided to write about yesterday because after seeing a good friend of mine who I haven't seen in a while I realized that even if no one else reads my blog, she finds comfort in knowing that there are other moms out there who have those days where they (as she said:) "die to themselves and die to themselves and the next day wake up and do it all over again." So, Maria, this one's for you.

Yesterday. Gabriel woke up in a state unlike many other mornings. Normally, I hear him talking and playing and sometimes even singing up there in his crib. Not yesterday. Yesterday he woke up screaming. A screaming as if pain was associated... so unlike other days, I took no time to slowly open my eyes and crawl out of bed. I didn't even allow this pregnant bladder to go to the bathroom before bolting up the steps to find out what could be wrong... nothing I discovered. He just decided to cry today. So, I tried to change his diaper, the whole while he screamed even harder and tried to flip around while I got poop all over myself, the ground and him and his outfit. It was fun. After changing him I realized he was pretty hungry or at least I thought food would ease the pain.. it did for a short while... then he pooped again. It was one of the grossest poops I have ever seen and smelled. It was half way up his back, all over his butt and covered his little guy (private part). It took about 12 wipes to get it all off and I sat considering a bath for quite some time until realizing that all this pooping had me running behind. After that I thought the day wouldn't get much worse. I had Encounter with Christ at my house yesterday morning and he did pretty good with all the distractions, but since his nap is usually at 11am and Encounter lasts till noon, he was overly tired. SO, I rocked him for a very long time... he fell alseep, I put him in his crib and he woke up. I thought, surely he will fall back asleep... nope... after 20 minutes, still awake, still crying and totally ticked at me. So, I got him out of his crib, giving up on the nap and tried to cheer him up for the next 20 minutes, while wiping snot off of me and him.... yuck. He was hungry again. So, I fed him. He eats like a vulture... HUGE bowls of food... tons. So, we sat and ate for about 40 minutes. Within 10 minutes of being done we had another poop... oh yes, just as grand and awesome as the last. At this point I decided to declare insanity because I just could not handle one more poop like this in my lifetime... at least yesterday I decided I couldn't. SO I changed it. That took about an hour and after he was clean, I laid on the ground next to him and just laughed. It is 1pm and I have had 3 poops and no nap. What better way to cure a little insanity: I pulled out the ice cream cones and chocolate and vanilla ice cream I have been craving every day of this pregnancy and I called Patrick and told him about our day so far... and he said, "What are you eating while you are telling me this?" "An ice cream cone," I said. He laughed so hard. "What!?" I said. "You are hilarious. I hope that helped." "It did," I said. We hung up the phone and I thanked Jesus for ice cream and the amazing sugar cones for the ice cream to go on top of and I licked that ice creamed and crunched that cone, while Gabriel (my well fed, well pooped, non-rested baby) played on the floor with his toys and giggled to himself while making car noises.

This is my life. This is what Jesus uses to make me holy. I have Jesus to thank for all the days of sleep strikes, poops and ice cream cones.

Marwige

Last weekend was our 3rd Three to Get Married retreat here in Nashville. The preparation and prayer and planning was super intense. With over 20 speakers, 12 couples, and the camp people to deal with I would have to say that it was purely God's grace that won us such a peaceful weekend. It wore me out so badly that I ended the weekend with the stomach flu... pregnancy and exhaustion don't go well together!!

With all that being said, I once again was amazed throughout the weekend at God's providential love within each and every couple who was there and each one who spoke. Each had been given such a different path in their marriage and to watch the fidelity through it all was simply uplifting. We had speakers who had converted to Catholicism, some who had spouses with cancer, some with 3 kids, some with 10 and others who were infertile. Some speakers who struggled with in-laws, some with how to raise their kids, others who were newly married, and none who were normal. It was amazing to see God's work in their hearts and lives and relationships. Each one had such a unique story which one way or another they all recognized as their path to holiness.

It was a reminder to me about the story I am living. What will the next page read and how have the previous chapters gone? What will the heavy crosses be and how will we get through? In the end, I don't think it matters as long as Christ is our center. Fr. Baker stressed throughout the weekend that marriage makes no sense whatsoever if you have no relationship with Christ, no goal of Heaven and you haven't decided to completely abandon yourself to Jesus. Of course, you could live life without having these things, but the bottom line is that your life will be pretty boring and pretty predictable. He sent quite a challenge to the couples to live always in the state of grace and to follow ALL of the Church's teachings instead of picking and choosing those you like. There is a wisdom in the Holy Spirit who has inspired the Church. Will we trust Him?

SO bring it. Lord, we abandon ourselves to you. What is it that you will ask of us? How can we be an image in our marriage of Christ's love for the Church.. the ultimate sacrifice.

We haven't been married quite three years and let me tell you, Christ has sent us on a roller coaster ride... it has required lots of trust, but the gifts from Him are countless and really quite hard to believe at times. He will never let you outdo Him in generosity.

Gabriel's First Easter