I just want to sit with him face to face and ask, "What do you want of me, Lord?" and I want Him to answer back, in clear words, with a gentle look, and with a clear goal. I want to hear the words. I need some contact.
I feel these days as if I am drowning... in kids, in laundry, in dishes, in financial decisions. Its constant. There is not a moment for myself. So, I wonder if he is asking for me to become less... less important, less achieved, less of everything...
He became a slave for us. Many days, I say to Patrick... "I'm just a slave, a lowly worker." Maybe that is all I am being asked. So, now to achieve it with great love. That is the part I'm struggling so much with. Then I would be more like him.
Help me, Lord. I need patience as you continue to ask humility of me.